


Time for A Fresh Start Perhaps

by SoonerOrLater



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Angst, Christmas, Coming Out, Domestic Fluff, Family, Fluff, Holidays, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:34:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28410975
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoonerOrLater/pseuds/SoonerOrLater
Summary: David and Patrick's first Christmas together is a time to think about Christmas past and future.(Set around the events of Merry Christmas Johnny Rose)
Relationships: David Rose/Patrick Brewer
Comments: 23
Kudos: 79





	1. Christmas Eve

**Author's Note:**

> A Christmas fic I didn't quite get finished in time for Christmas this year. The title is from Bridget Jones' Diary. Because nice boys do indeed kiss like that.

Patrick held out a small package wrapped in blue paper. ‘Happy 7th night of Hanukkah’ he smiled. 

David smiled back. Patrick had surprised him six days ago with a small package on the counter at work as they closed up- at sundown. 

‘I don’t have a Menorah, but I can do Hanukkah gifts, and I figured that and food were really what you’d focus on.’ 

‘I would kill for a decent Latke at this point.’ David said, then flicking his eyes down to the neatly wrapped gift, smiled a lopsided smile. ‘This is…’ he shrugged ‘Very nice of you.’ he didn’t quite know what to do with himself when Patrick gave him gifts- as much as he loved the attention it was still quite a foreign concept. He hadn’t had a Hanukkah gift since he was small and Grandma Rose would visit for the holidays. When she’d died, and with him and Alexis getting older their parents had slipped into the Holiday Tradition of just giving them money. And then they’d decided to just ignore the holidays altogether. 

Patrick leaned on the counter ‘Well I didn’t know if your family did anything for the holidays, but since I’m staying here, I figured.’ he shrugged. He hadn’t quite known how it would go down. David didn’t really talk about being religious- Patrick knew he’d had a Bar Mitzvah thanks to Steive wanting to pass on the basketball court story, for which he was of course grateful. But other than being conveniently Kosher when it got him out of eating something he didn’t want to, David didn’t talk much about religion. Or indeed the holidays. 

David picked up the gift ‘You do realise that as I’m only half Jewish and half Christian I require Christmas presents as well.’

‘Duly noted.’ Patrick smiled. ‘Open it.’ He could at least rely on David being grateful for any gift given- even if only for judging Patrick’s taste. 

David unwrapped the paper and revealed what looked like a leather-bound book. He flipped open a page and realised it was a photo album. Into which Patrick had put a picture of the two of them on the first page. He covered his mouth trying to hide the grin that was escaping. 

‘I know photo albums are kind of old-fashioned, but given you probably don’t have much from your old life I thought…’ Patrick shrugged. 

‘I don’t need any from my old life.’ David said with a smile. And leaned over and kissed him. ‘It’s perfect.’ he didn’t have any other words. He loved that Patrick loved to give gifts, but despite occasionally mocking his taste, what was clear was he really thought about it too. 

Patrick blushed and looked down. David leaned over the counter and kissed him again. 

‘Ok, back to work. The Christmas ornaments aren’t going to restock themselves.’ Patrick had grinned. But loved the backwards glance and smile David had given him. 

He had followed with a gift every night. Night two had been some decadent donuts he'd shipped in. Night three had been socks, which David had mocked him for, but also been secretly pleased about- they were his favourite kind, and expensive, for socks, which he had reluctantly forced himself to no longer indulge in. Patrick had obviously noted. Night four he’d gone back to food with some fancy Belgian chocolates- David being of the opinion that all candy either needed to be the worst, or the most decadent. Night five had been a book on interior design he’d picked up in Elmdale months ago when they were shopping but decided not to buy. Night six, had been some of David’s favourite moisturisers that he thought had been discontinued. 

And on night seven, as the Christmas party wound down, they’d escaped into David and Alexis’ room for a moment of quiet. Which had momentarily been derailed after David suggested ‘making use of the mistletoe’ which Patrick pointed out didn’t exist and after a brief debate around using imagination, escalated into what could only be described as a Christmas make-out session. Eventually Patrick decided to be the sensible one and detangle himself. David huffed.

‘As much as I am enjoying this.’ He said leaning up to kiss David once more, pulling back before he could be pulled back in, ‘Your Mom and Dad and sister, and Roland are still in the next room and I don’t think that’s the kind of Christmas party they had in mind.’

‘Maybe Roland.’ David said with a raise of his eyebrows. 

‘David it’s bad enough when he reminds me of his...adventures, I don’t need you bringing it up.’ 

‘You brought it up.’ 

Patrick silenced him with a kiss. ‘Distracting from that, delightful chain of thought, do you want your present?’

David did a little jump up and down. Patrick laughed. He could be delightfully child- like at times. As well as infuriatingly child-like. He grinned and went to his bag that he’d left on David’s bed. 

‘Happy 7th Night of Hanukkah’ he said with a smile. Handing over another neatly wrapped package. David gave it a shake and a prod, just like a kid. 

‘I did mention that as a delightful half and half situation I require Christmas presents as well.’ he added, squishing at the package, which he discovered would not squish. 

‘My family do presents on Christmas day, not Christmas Eve, so you’ll just have to be patient and wait for Santa to come.’ Patrick said, wrapping his arms around David’s waist. David made a face. 

‘Ok but if that’s some way of you telling me you’re going to role play Santa let me put it out there right now, we are not doing that.’

‘Ew. No.’ Patrick squeezed his hips ‘Though you’d make a beautiful Elf.’ Patrick pulled on his jacket, and immediately David was back clinging onto him.

‘I do look good in green.’ he said with a raised eyebrow ‘And I have worn stockings before…’ he raised an eyebrow and let that hang. 

‘Hmm there’s an idea for the Store next year…’ Patrick mused, folding his arms. ‘Just open it.’ he said with a grin. 

David delightedly tore off the wrapping. It was a leather journal-similar but not quite the same as his own. He grinned. ‘It’s lovely.’ he said running his hands over the cover. 

‘I know it’s not quite New Years but ‘time for a fresh start perhaps.’’ Patrick said, doing a terrible English accent. 

David’s face lit up ‘You do pay attention to the movies we watch.’

Patrick smirked. ‘David I say this with love, you made me watch Bridget Jones five times this year. Once was last week-’

‘Well it is a Christmas movie-’

‘-It was bound to stick eventually.’ Patrick grinned, then stepped in and kissed him again. 

‘Wait a minute, nice boys don’t kiss like that.’ David said, pulling back with a smile. Amused at Patrick’s ongoing indignance, but also charmed that his romcom education was finally sticking. 

‘Oh yes they fucking do.’ Patrick replied, leaning in to prove he was correct, and to silence David’s laughter. He had never been against romcoms per se, just never his first choice. He was however slowly coming around to the genre. And watching David be charmed by his appreciation was also oddly charming. They leaned into the kiss, perhaps a little too much because the next thing Patrick knew Mr Rose’s voice was booming through the doorway and they were jumping apart like guilty teenagers. 

‘David have you seen the light-’ Johnny began ‘Oh um, sorry David, Patrick I didn’t know you were, uh, busy.’

Patrick wiped at his mouth and blushed. ‘Sorry Mr Rose, just um saying goodnight.’ 

Johnny nodded, a small smile creeping in. ‘Well, don’t rush on my account I’ll um, be back.’ he winked at David. 

‘Ew Dad.’ David said, rolling his eyes. 

‘I should go.’ Patrick said with a smile. It took him another ten minutes to actually leave. And when he did he could feel David’s eyes on him as he walked towards the road. He smiled, glancing back with a wave at the Motel covered in a light snow. He felt content, happy even as he walked back to Ray’s. It might not be his usual Christmas Eve but he couldn’t have asked for a better one. 

Patrick got back to his room at Ray’s and a wave of sadness washed over him. He cursed himself. He’d had a perfect evening. More perfect that anyone could have imagined really, at the Roses’ Christmas party. 

It had been a typically ridiculous, but brilliant day. From getting a frantic call to ‘Come and fix this tree’ which at that point could have meant anything with David. What he actually found- a bunch of evergreen branches scattered all over the Motel room floor, and David trying to tie them back on- was hilarious and adorable in equal measure. He’d taken charge in what David referred to as ‘Boy Scout’ mode and quickly shooed David away, while he spent two hours gluing the branches back on. It had actually been quite nice. He’d forced David to go to the Store and get the decorations, and while he’d glued, Mrs Rose had made him coffee- which she quickly turned Irish, and chatted to him. 

David found it strange how he actually enjoyed spending time with his parents, but Patrick genuinely did. And the hour or so alone while he methodically glued tree branches, and Moira talked to him about Christmas parties past, and Soap Opera life was really very pleasant. A little while in she fixed him in her gaze and asked. 

‘And what of your Christmas traditions Patrick? And why are you here gluing sad tree branches in a Motel and not off with your own fam-i-ly?’

He’d paused in his glueing for a second and shrugged. 

‘Do you not get along with your family dear? I mean lord knows if you met my sister you’d understand why I don’t with mine-’

‘Oh no, not at all Mrs Rose.’ Patrick interrupted. ‘No it just, um wasn’t convenient, you know with the Store and all to go home, you know I couldn’t leave David to cope with the holiday rush alone.’

‘Well I’m sure we can agree that might be a recipe for if not disaster, then high drama.’ she reached over and topped up his now empty coffee cup with whiskey and winked. ‘Still a lot has changed since you were back home last I suppose...and maybe the Holidays and all its heightened em-o-tions are not the time. Am I right Pat?’ 

Patrick nodded. Mrs Rose sometimes had an uncanny perceptiveness that David really didn’t give her credit for. ‘I think you might be.’ he said with a little smile. 

‘Next year maybe.’ She said kindly. ‘Now where is my Son with those ornaments? If he’s got distracted and wandered off...that boy...head in the clouds I swear. Well I don’t have to tell you. Do you know one Christmas we took him to see Santa- we were in England, I was filming a charming horror film set in a manor house- anyway we went to this charming Winter Wonderland and I lost him. Just lost him. Found him HOURS later sitting with the Reindeer. Feeding them his lunch.’

‘Which I had gone to buy myself because you forgot to feed us.’ David’s voice came from the doorway. ‘Anyway Santa was creepy and animals, despite the smell, are usually better company than people at Christmas. Or any time.’ 

‘Well maybe we should have just left you in a barn then.’ Moira said, refilling her glass. 

‘Starting early are we?’ David said, raising an eyebrow. 

‘Yes we are.’ Patrick said, raising his own mug. 

David rolled his eyes. ‘Well share then.’ he said leaning down first for a whiskey-tinged kiss, then taking the cup. His eyes finally fixed on the tree. And lit up. ‘You did this?!’ he exclaimed. 

‘Well I am a Boy Scout’ Patrick said proudly. David kissed him again, his own whiskey tinged lips mixing with Patrick’s. ‘But you are on decorating duty.’ he added. 

David huffed. ‘Of course.’ 

The tree might not have been perfect but it was hard to imagine a more perfect Christmas party. And it warmed Patrcik’s heart to see Mr Rose so happy. He had a lot of time for him, and the way he tried his very best for his family, his loyalty and all round decency. He was glad he’d been able to help- even if the help was mostly supergluing his fingers together while drinking whiskey. And as much as David mocked Stevie, he’d felt a lump in his own throat as they’d listened to the choir sing. 

He’d stood outside with David in the slight snow flurry, and kissed him goodnight after. 

‘Merry Christmas David.’ he said with a smile, looking up at his boyfriend’s hair getting messed up by snow. 

‘Merry Christmas Patrick.’ David had given him a lopsided smile and leaned in for one more quick kiss. Patrick had gone to turn away, but something had pulled him back and he’d gone back for one more hug. David maybe sensing he needed it, but without saying a word, hung on charactististcally tightly, and just a bit too long, before releasing him into the night. Patrick had glanced back to see him still standing at the Motel doorway giving a little wave as he made his way down the path to walk home. 

And now he was home. In his weird little room at Ray’s- who was thankfully spending Christmas, after selling all his trees, with a cousin in Elmdale-alone. He shrugged off his coat and took out his phone. There was already a message from David. 

‘Love you. Merry Christmas.X’

He smiled. David might not be the most astute emotionally all the time. But he had a sixth sense for when Patrick needed to hear from him. Even if he didn’t always nail the delivery. 

‘Love you too. Going to watch Die Hard before bed. Not Christmas without it. X’

He could feel the eye-roll before David even answered. 

‘Have I taught you nothing? X’

‘Not a thing. X’ 

Patrick was smiling now at least. He undressed and got himself ready for bed. He considered a final Christmas drink but honestly the afternoon whiskey and wine at the party already was making his head swim. He settled for tea instead. And he was too tired to actually watch anything, despite his jokes about Die Hard. He crawled into bed with his book instead. And couldn’t help but feel a moment of sadness that he was alone. 

He’d actually spent every Christmas Eve alone. In the sense of sleeping alone. Occasionally he’d gone out with High School friends to a bar after dinner. But even the times he and Rachel were together they’d never spent Christmas with each other’s families. So Patrick had always found himself back in his childhood bedroom alone. And now he felt himself missing that. The house was too quiet. At home his Mom would be clattering about in the kitchen until late. Or his Dad would be coming home after having drinks with his work buddies. And they’d go into the living room for a whiskey. Or he would be out at a bar with his friends or his cousins and sneaking home like he’d broken curfew. Tonight had been perfect, but it didn’t stop this aching moment of loneliness at midnight on Christmas eve. He closed his book and turned out the light. Things would look better in the morning.


	2. Christmas Morning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patrick has some surprises for David on Christmas morning.

It was early. David wasn’t sure how early, but too early to be awake, especially after the amount of wine he’d drunk last night. But he could hear his parents clattering about next door, so it must be morning. He blinked his eyes open. There was something at the end of his bed. Something bright red against the pristine white. David leaned down and picked it up. It was a stocking, a Christmas stocking. He’d never, as far as he could remember had a Christmas stocking. 

‘I see you saw Santa came!’ Alexis said with a grin coming out of the bathroom. ‘If Santa wears straight-legged denim now.’ she screwed up her face and blinked at him. 

‘How did he…’ David peered into the top of it, there were candy bars nestling on some wrapped gifts. 

‘He might have had an Elf to help him.’ Alexis said, tossing her hair. ‘Also he left me one too which was like super sweet of him.’ 

David grinned and dove into the Stocking. Along with a selection of his favourite candy bars, and some chocolate coins, there were a handful of small packages. He tore into one, which contained four of the fine felt pens he used for writing in his notebooks. In another some pencils, the exact type he used for sketching. Again Patrick paid attention. He’d also put in some of David’s favourite soaps from the Store, and at the bottom was a little wooden box. David opened it and inside was a note ‘So you stop losing one ring and blaming me.’ David grinned. There was also at the very bottom, a satsuma. 

‘He gave me all the totally fancy soaps and moisturisers my brother is too cheap to give me from his very own store.’ Alexis said. ‘And Candy. Trade me this, I don’t like peanuts.’ she held out a bar and David tossed his over in return. 

‘Maybe.’ David said leaning over to the floor on the side closest to the wall, ‘You can stop calling your brother cheap now.’ he pulled out a gift basket filled with Rose Apothecary products. All the ones he knew his sister liked. ‘Merry Christmas Alexis.’ he said holding it out. 

‘Yay!’ she exclaimed, clapping her hands ‘I knew you weren’t a cheapskate really.’ she booped his nose with her spare hand and he swatted her off. ‘And.’ she continued ‘Don’t say I never give you anything.’ She reached under her own bed, and gave him an entirely over-the-top pile of gift wrap and ribbon. ‘Ted wrapped it, he’s...enthusiastic.’ 

He squished the package, it was really soft. 

‘Don’t get too excited- or judgmental- it’s several seasons old by now but I thought you’d like.’ 

He frowned and opened it. It was a supersoft, plain black sweater, with rows of silver lightning bolts across the front.

‘It’s elegant and classy. I thought it could be your Christmas sweater.’ 

‘Patrick’s family like to wear ugly Christmas sweaters.’ David said, making a face. 

‘Well next year when you visit them, you can wear that and show them how classy Christmas sweaters look.’ she shot him a grin at the implications of that. 

‘Thank you.’ he smiled. ‘It’s lovely.’ 

‘Ok don’t get too sentimental about it.’ she said. Before leaping up and wrapping herself around his neck in a hug. After a moment he hugged her back. ‘Merry Christmas David.’ she said. 

‘Merry Christmas Alexis’ he said back. Smiling into her hair. 

‘Merry Christmas kids!’ their Dad’s voice boomed from the doorway. 

Alexis deranged herself ‘Merry Christmas Dad!’ she exclaimed and bounded to him, kissing his cheek. Moira dragged herself in after him, and wrapped an arm around Alexis. 

‘Merry Christmas my children.’ she said. ‘Has Santa been?’ she raised an eyebrow. 

‘Yes, Santa is David’s perfect button boyfriend.’ Alexis said with a grin. ‘He made Stockings and everything.’ 

‘He also left your Mom and I a little something.’ Johnny said with a smile ‘Scotch for me, wine for your Mother, along with some lovely soaps from the Store.’ 

David blushed and bit his lip looking down. ‘Well that was...nice of him.’ he said. 

‘Come on Dav-id out of bed!’ Moira said ‘Break-fast.’ 

David bit his lip and smiled ‘Actually I think I’m going to skip that, if it’s ok.’

‘But we got pastries!’ Johnny said leaning an arm around his wife, who wrapped her arms around his waist.

‘Oh John.’ she said ‘I think David has suddenly realised he might have another option for Christmas this year.’ 

David jumped out of bed, and headed towards the bathroom. Pausing to kiss his Mom on the cheek. ‘Merry Christmas Mom.’ he said. Moria smiled and jerked her head towards his father. David rolled his eyes. ‘Dad.’ he said. ‘Merry Christmas, though I remind you again you have zero authority over this holiday.’

‘Well then Happy Hanukkah David.’ Johnny grinned, and pulled David into a quick hug. His son tolerated it for a second then leaned in. ‘Happy Hanukkah too then.’ he could practically hear the roll of his eyes but he gave him a quick squeeze anyway before David extracted himself, and headed to the bathroom to get ready. 

Clearly the whiskey and wine took effect because it was almost nine when Patrick woke up. Or more accurately was woken up, by his phone ringing. He groaned and rolled over. 

‘Merry Christmas!’ his Mom’s voice was infuriatingly cheerful for the early- to his slightly muddled brain-hour. 

‘Merry Christmas Mom.’ he half croaked. 

‘Oh honey are you ok? You don’t sound well?’

He sat up and took a swig of water. ‘No, no fine. Just not quite awake…’ he steeled himself for a telling off. 

‘It’s almost nine!’ there it was ‘Honestly man of leisure today I suppose…’

‘Something like that.’ Patrick said. Feeling another pang, as he fully woke up, about what Christmas usually looked like. Usually his Mom was up, as usual, at 6.30 and cooking breakfast. They’d have pancakes before going into the Living Room to open presents. By 9.30 she’d be herding them out the door for a ‘Christmas Walk’ though now he thought about it, what was that festive about walking around the local park in freezing snow was a mystery. 

‘I said did you go out for drinks with David last night?'' his Mom asked, he’d obviously zoned out. 

‘Oh um.’ he’d forgotten he’d mentioned them going for drinks. He’d joked about it being their ‘Office Christmas Party’. ‘Actually David’s family had a party and invited pretty much the whole town, so I went there. It was nice. Christmassy.’

‘I thought they were Jewish?’ his Mom said. 

‘Holiday Party then.’ Patrick said ‘And half Jewish, Mr Rose is Jewish, Mrs Rose isn’t.’ he chuckled ‘David calls it a ‘half and half situation.’’

His Mom laughed ‘That boy.’ she said ‘So funny. Anyway tell him Merry Christmas when you see him. And Happy Hanukkah- is it still Hanukkah?’

‘For one more night.’ Patrick swung his legs out of bed and stretched ‘they’re not exactly devout.’ he smiled to himself, for no reason other than thinking of David as he reached for his robe. 

‘So was it a nice party?’ his Mom asked. ‘The whole town was there you say? Did you meet anyone nice?’ 

‘Mom.’ he said, making a face. He didn’t know if it was his imagination, paranoia or whether his Mom had recently decided enough time had passed since Rachel to be over-invested in his love life- or as she saw it lack of one, again. ‘It wasn’t that sort of party. Just you know the Roses, and people from town, Mrs Rose’s choir, Ted the Vet that sort of thing.’

‘Now is Ted still dating David’s sister?’ His Mom asked, ‘Because you know if he’s not…’

‘Mom!’ Patrick said. ‘Alexis is practically like a sister to me.’ he bit his lip. That came out a bit strong. ‘You know she’s my business partner’s sister, it wouldn’t be right.’

‘No I suppose not.’ His Mom said. Thankfully deterred.’Mixing business and personal relationships like that, probably asking for trouble.’ Patrick leaned against his door and closed his eyes. This was too hard. He couldn’t keep it up much longer. Not now he reminded himself. Don’t blurt it out on Christmas. ‘Anyway dear, thank you so much for the gifts, honestly it’s lovely to see what you sell in the Store and it’s all so beautiful.’

Patrick smiled in spite of everything. He was so relieved his Mom not only liked the gifts but was proud of what he was doing. He’d written little notes with everything detailing where they’d come from, about the person making them, all of that. And his Mom was off on a tangent now talking about one of the fabric artists who made their scarves. After a while she came up for air. ‘Anyway your Dad wants to say hello.’ she said handing the phone over. 

‘Patrick!’ his Dad sounded chirpy. Patrick was downstairs now waiting for the coffee machine to fill. He smiled. ‘Your Mom talked your ear off yet?’ he said, dropping his voice to a theatrical whisper ‘I heard that!’ his Mom’s voice came from what he assumed was the other side of the kitchen. He could picture them both, his Dad at the kitchen table and his Mom starting on the vegetables for dinner. He pushed some of that thought away. 

‘Hey Dad.’ he said quietly, ‘How are you doing?’

‘Oh you know, can’t complain.’ his Dad said ‘How was business at the Store for Christmas?’ Patrick smiled, his Dad could be relied on to shift into safe territory for them both. 

‘Good, really good.’ Patrick said, pouring the coffee. He launched into a detailed account of their sales, and what he projected for January, his Dad listening attentively and asking him questions. This felt good, better. Safer. Eventually he heard his Mom ‘Ok enough shop talk it’s Christmas’

‘That’s my cue.’ His Dad said. ‘Merry Christmas son.’ he said. ‘Come visit when you get some free time yeah? Your Mom misses you.’

Patrick swallowed. ‘Will do Dad.’

‘Oh and Patrick?’

‘Hmm?’ 

‘Those sales are impressive for a first year in business, you two should be very proud.’

Patrick bit his lip. ‘Thanks Dad.’ he managed. At the back of his mind was an ongoing worry he was disappointing his parents by leaving his stable, good job and old life behind. He was happy, the Store was good, but he worried his parents thought less of him for it. 

‘Did you open your gifts yet?’ His Mom was back on the phone now ‘Um not yet.’ he said sipping his coffee ‘I was saving them, for a bit later. Stretch out the festive cheer.’

‘Oh honey, make sure you get out of the house today, go for a walk or something. I don’t like to think of you all alone.’

‘It’s just one day Mom. I’m fine. Ray will be back tomorrow, and David and I had plans for a Boxing Day trip to Elmdale. You know check out the competition in Stores, have lunch, whatever.’ it wasn’t exactly a lie. They’d decided to stay closed for two days, and he had promised David a shopping trip and lunch. 

‘Oh well I’m sure you’ll be fine. Just get out for a walk ok?’ 

Patrick rolled his eyes ‘Ok Mom.’ 

‘And don’t roll your eyes.’ she was laughing ‘I love you honey, Merry Christmas.’

He smiled ‘Merry Christmas Mom’ he hung up, and stared into his coffee for a moment. It would be ok. It was all ok. And Christmas was one day. And they’d have other family Christmases. And it would be ok, he reminded himself. He debated breakfast but decided to drag himself back upstairs to shower and dress first. He stood in front of the fridge, genuinely debating the leftover pizza versus eggs options for breakfast and yawning when there was knocking at the door. He wondered briefly if Schitt’s Creek was the kind of place to do Caroling on Christmas morning because that level of cheer was a little more than he was ready for. 

There was knocking again. 

‘Coming!’ he shouted from the stairs running down past Ray’s office and studio. He flung the door open to see David standing there. ‘David?’ he blinked. 

‘Yes let me in it’s fucking freezing.’ he was bundled up in a huge coat and scarf so wasn’t exactly about to expire of hypothermia. He was however weighed down by both his overnight bag and another three Rose Apothecary bags. 

‘Did you walk?’ Patrick frowned at the slightly dishevelled sight. 

‘Yes Dad wouldn’t let me have the car.’ He hopped fro one foot to the other. 

Patrick moved to one side and let him past, he was covered in a light dusting of snow. ‘What are you doing here?’ He said, dusting some of it off his shoulders. 

‘Um I think the traditional greeting is ‘Merry Christmas’’ he said with a raised eyebrow as Patrick leaned around him to shut the door. 

‘Um Merry Christmas David’ Patrick said with a smile, just as David swept him into a kiss. Despite awkwardly having no hands. It might have started as a sweet greeting and Merry Christmas, but Patrick a bit on edge from his phone call found himself pulling at David’s sweater and looping a hand around his neck pulling him in and kissing him deeply. David was released and stood awkwardly still holding his bags but grinning. 

‘Well a very Merry Christmas to you.’ David said with a grin. ‘Do I smell coffee?’ he was already heading up the stairs.’ 

‘Yeah, um.’ Patrick picked up David’s bag and followed him. ‘Not that I’m not pleased to see you-’

‘Clearly’ David shot him a mischievous glance behind 

‘But what are you doing here? I thought you were hibernating for Christmas.’ 

David stopped. ‘What if I wanted to hibernate together?’ he shifted looking down. 

Patrick grinned. ‘I’d say get up the stairs so I can make us some breakfast. I assume you haven’t eaten?’ David shook his head with a grin and bounded up the last couple of steps. 

David stood in the kitchen, shifting from one foot to the other. Patrick threw him a questioning glance. David held out two of the Rose Apothecary bags. ‘Food.’ he said. ‘I didn’t make it. Twyla did. Well the Cafe did. It’s um…’ he rolled his eyes. 

‘David?’ Patrick folded his arms ‘Did you get the Cafe to make us Christmas dinner?’

He rolled his eyes. ‘Maybe.’ he looked down and muttered something. 

‘What?’ Patrick said. 

‘I said, I might have got them to make it for my family too.’ 

Patrick couldn’t help but grin. David usually just forgot to think of other people, with no malice in it, just sheer obliviousness. But when he remembered he was charmingly embarrassed by the sentiment. 

‘Look at you being positively festive!’ Patrick exclaimed. 

‘Yeah well I knew you wouldn’t want to cook for yourself, or just us, I mean not that you invited me I just invited myself, but I brought food. But if you don’t want to or whatever-’

Patrick cut him off with a kiss. ‘Thank you David.’ he said. He’d learned sometimes just a simple ‘thank you’ was enough to slow the roll of David’s brain running away with him. He took the bags off him and unloaded the packaged food into the fridge. He noticed one of them clearly had a large amount of cake in and smiled. And made a note that clearly giving food as well as receiving it was one way David understood romantic gestures. It was Patrick’s turn to shift back and fore a bit. 

‘What?’ David asked. 

‘Actually I got food. For dinner. I um, well I sort of assumed by dinnertime you’d have...come over.’ he smiled shyly at David who grinned. 

‘Well the cafe is closed for the evening…’ he grinned. 

‘Exactly what I thought.’

‘And Ray is gone until tomorrow night…’ he raised an eyebrow. ‘What is it? Dinner?’ 

Patrick broke into a grin. ‘Wait and see.’ he said. ‘Breakfast first.’ he turned back to the fridge with a bit more of a spring in his step. 

David settled himself in at the kitchen table as Patrick dragged eggs out of the fridge setting to work on breakfast. He held up the bacon and David nodded enthusiastically. He put the pan on and cracked the eggs. 

‘Make yourself useful and put some fresh coffee on.’ he said nodding to the pot while he whisked the eggs. David got up, in order to reach the coffee in the cupboard he had to reach around Patrick. And while he didn’t technically have to kiss his neck on the way back around, it didn’t hurt. Patrick glanced sideways at him and grinned. ‘So you’re out very early, were your family driving you crazy already or what?’ he asked. 

David measured the coffee into the machine carefully, taking more time about it than he needed too. ‘No I mean they were all having breakfast, and then Mom and Dad were talking about taking a drive to Elmdale to see their Christmas lights and pick up some take out but.’ he shrugged ‘I just thought you were here alone all day…’ he glanced over ‘I mean if that’s what you want, I can text my Dad he can swing by and I’ll go with them and-’ Patrick cut him off with a kiss. 

‘Why would I want that?’ he asked. 

David shrugged. Patrick frowned but chose to ignore it for now in favour of cooking breakfast. He busied himself with the eggs and bacon and tried to ignore the fact he could feel David’s eyes on his back. 

David watched Patrick work at breakfast. His fluffy blue sweater pushed up to his elbows- that was going to stretch but David had learned not to ‘correct’ his sweater-wearing. He was wearing an old pair of jeans- not the smart ones he usually wore to work, but what David now recognised as his ‘weekend around the house’ jeans. Secretly he quite enjoyed the more casual version of Patrick as much as the usual ‘put together’ one. Especially when, as now his slightly-too-big jeans slipped down as he bent over and revealed a flash of what seemed to be some festive red underwear. Of course, Patrick chose that moment to look over at him and catch him sharing. 

‘Plates’ he said gesturing with a spatula. David obeyed. Patrick seemed fine he mused, he knew he was sad not to see his family. Although David had tried to convince him to go. Ultimately it was sensible of him to stay, the Store had been busy, he’d needed the help. But he felt bad, Patrick was close with his family but he hadn’t seen them in however long. And clearly, they were a functional normal family who enjoyed the Holidays. He handed Patrick the plates and leaned over and kissed his cheek as he did so. Patrick smiled over at him with a look of ‘what was that for.’ 

‘You looked cute. I wanted to kiss you.’ he rolled his eyes. 

‘Well then kiss me David.’ Patrick said with a mischievous sideways glance. David broke into a grin and carefully grabbed Patrick’s shoulders, and not so carefully spun him around to face him. He lowered his head, and kissed him really quickly, chastely and pulled back with a grin. Patrick glared at him and he leaned in, and kissed him slowly, deliberately, pulling his hands together behind Patrick’s shoulders and pulling him closer to him. He felt Patrick’s hands on his waist and grinned when he managed to elicit a small moan from him. He pulled back. 

‘Better.’ Patrick said with a grin. ‘But we’d better eat before we get too distracted.’ he winked. 

‘Did you just wink?’ David grinned as he kissed Patrick’s neck. 

‘Behave.’ Patrick swatted at him with the spatula. Then added ‘Besides, we have a house to ourselves...all day.’ 

David bit his lip and took his food to the table with a flourish. Moments later he grinned with his mouthful as he ate the breakfast Patrick had cooked. He’d almost turned back on his way here. Somewhere between the Motel and Ray’s he’d convinced himself that Patrick wanted to hide away for the day and not see him. That maybe Patrick hated the Holidays and that’s why he had stayed here. That maybe he was fed up with David too, after two weeks of longer workdays. Or maybe in general. His mind had raced as it did even now as he chewed on bacon with usual speed. He was right, it was all fine. 

‘David slow down!’ Patrick rolled his eyes. 

David swallowed. He could have been talking about his mind as much as the speed he was eating. ‘It’s good.’ he said through a mouthful. 

Patrick laughed at him. And wondered if David had always eaten as if he’d never been fed. His slightly insatiable appetite was one of the things he found amusing and endearing in equal measure. And he’d realised, after the first few times doing it, cooking for David and the enthusiasm he reserved for food like nothing else, brought him a lot of joy. Maybe too, he reasoned having someone to look after. David caught him looking, he must have been staring. 

‘You going to finish that?’ David waved his knife at Patrick’s plate. He dutifully gave him the extra slice of bacon he’d put there for exactly that reason. 

‘You know my Mom cooks pancakes Christmas morning.’ Patrick said out of nowhere. ‘I should have made those.’ 

‘Too sweet.’ David said thought a mouthful of eggs, ‘You eat so much sweet stuff the rest of Christmas day you need something salty and carb filled to start the day off.’ he bit into his toast to make a point. 

‘I assume Moira Rose was never big on cooking Christmas breakfast?’ Patrick asked with a smile. Assuming a team of staff attended to their every whim. 

‘Mrs Rose is not. Grandma Rose on the other hand, when she was alive, was known to kick the cook out of the kitchen.’ David smiled at the memory of his Grandmother, a woman who mildly terrified his Mom, and certainly their staff, but was also as down to earth and kind as anyone David had known as a child. ‘She used to come for Hanukkah- she lived in Vancouver the rest of the year.’

‘You’re Dad isn’t from there though?’ Patrick frowned. 

‘She moved to live with her boyfriend after Grandpa Rose died.’ David said with a wicked grin ‘Younger guy, big in the film business there.’ 

Patrick grinned. That was a plot twist he hadn’t anticipated. ‘Good for Grandma Rose.’ he grinned. 

‘A true inspiration.’ David grinned. He thought for a moment ‘I don’t know anything about your Grandparents.’ he said ‘Did you-I mean are they- sorry.’ he shrugged there was no polite way to ask ‘are they still alive’ 

‘Just my Mom’s Mom.’ Patrick said rescuing David from the awkwardness, ‘I never knew the others- Dad’s parents were a lot older, so they died before I was born. Grandad Williams, when I was two I think? I don’t remember him.’

‘Williams’ David said as if mulling it over. 

Patrick frowned ‘It’s my Mom’s maiden name yeah.’ he said with a shrug. 

David smiled. ‘Just knowing more things about you.’ he shrugged now. And Patrick got it. Family details weren’t something David typically got to learn. 

‘Do you want a family tree?’ Patrick teased. ‘But yeah Nain Williams will be there’ he caught himself ‘Her Mother was Welsh, so that’s the Welsh for Grandma.’ he was blushing, he realised looking down. Realising he didn’t talk about his family that much with David. ‘The rest of me is Irish if you’re curious.’ he shrugged. 

‘What a Celtic mix!’ David exclaimed with a grin, taking a tip of his coffee. ‘Is it a big Brewer-Williams-Whatever Christmas then?’ he wrapped his hands around the mug and leaned in as if Patrick was about to tell him a story. 

‘Some years.’ Patrick nodded ‘We usually have Christmas morning just us, me Mom and Dad. Then lunch we either go to Mom’s Sister Karen’s or have them over. Sometimes her brother’s-Uncle Phillip’s but he lives farther away so it makes sense for Mom or Karen to host, and Karen has a bigger house and is closer my Grandmother’s place, so it makes sense. And then we usually visit one of my Dad’s brother’s for the evening, again they do a sort of rotation thing. And then on Boxing Day, it’s some version of the same again with lunch and dinner at someone’s house- but that’s less of a cooking thing usually a buffet so my Mom will host something and my married cousins who stay home Christmas day come to that too and- he stopped himself. David was grinning at him. 

‘So yeah not really.’ he said sipping his coffee raising an eyebrow. It seemed the Brewers were indeed the nauseatingly functional family they seemed to be. 

‘Guess a bit different to what you’re used to.’ Patrick shrugged. ‘You also I bet have never slept on a camp bed in Uncle Phillip’s basement with his four dogs.’

‘I have not.’ David wrinkled his nose. ‘Should we ever visit Uncle Phillip I will pay for a Hotel.’ he caught himself ‘I mean um.’ he shook his head, seeing Patrick catch it but not make a big deal. ‘Anyway, after pancakes what is next in a Brewer Family Christmas.’ 

Patrick grinned ‘Well presents obviously!’ he said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone curious the pronunciation of 'Nain' for Patrick's Grandma is Nay-in (dependant slightly on your accent) fun fact, Kylie Minogue calls her Grandma Nain, as like Patrick's she is also Welsh ;)


	3. Christmas Morning 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> David and Patrick exchange presents, and go for a walk in the snow.

‘Anyway, after pancakes what is next in a Brewer Family Christmas.’ 

Patrick grinned ‘Well presents obviously!’ he said. 

David’s face lit up and he saw Patrick’s look of great amusement. ‘Come on then.’ he got to his feet. Then paced while Patrick insisted on - deliberately slowly to his mind- clearing the table and putting the dishes in the sink. David looked at him expectantly. 

‘Bedroom.’ Patrick said, jerking his head. 

‘Oh is it that kind of present?’ David asked with a raised eyebrow. 

‘Behave.’ Patrick said. Then with a grin added ‘Later.’ David fell into step behind him scooping up the bags Patrick assumed had gifts in them, along with his overnight bag. ‘No tree I’m afraid so you’ll have to use your imagination.’ 

David carried the bags to the bed and carefully arranged his gifts for Patrick on the bed while Patrick went to the wardrobe to retrieve his own. David was quite proud of himself for not snooping even when he’d been left unsupervised in Patrick’s bedroom. Truthfully he knew he didn’t want to disappoint Patrick by spoiling his surprises. 

Patrick turned around and grinned, David was meticulously arranging his pile of gifts. He knew somehow there was going to be a very strict order for opening them too. He carried his own pile over to the bed and pulled himself up on the bed next to David. ‘Ok you go first.’ he said holding the package in his hand out to David. 

David took the offered package and squeezed. Then paused. 

‘What?’ Patrick said ‘You can’t be judging it before you even opened it!’

David shook his head. ‘Just, um.’ he turned his eyes skyward. ‘I know I mock your gift-giving, but this week with your Hanukkah presents, and the Stocking and giving gifts to my family…’ he shrugged. ‘Nobody ever….’ he rolled his eyes again. 

Patrick leaned over on the bed and kissed his cheek. ‘You’re welcome.’ he said with a smile ‘It was my pleasure.’ 

David nodded and grinned. Squeezing the gift in his hands again. Patrick gave him a nod, telling him to open it. It was soft. He tilted his head and ripped into the paper. He instantly recognised it and grinned. A scarf by Caroline Sherar, one of their suppliers. He often commented on the quality and design but had resisted buying his own. This wasn’t one of her usual patterns, it was a black and white geometric design. He frowned, ‘Is this?’ he tilted his head. 

Patrick nodded ‘Custom design. One of a kind David Rose scarf.’ Patrick shrugged ‘Figured you might as well stand out in a crowd.’ 

David shook his head and laughed. ‘Well someone should.’ he said, stroking the soft wool. Then dramatically wrapping it around his neck. He laughed. ‘I guess you better open this one.’ he handed Patrick a package. It was similar, if not identical in size and shape to the one he’d just opened. And with good reason. Patrick opened it and laughed. It was a scarf from Caroline’s collection, similar design but not a colour pattern she uses anywhere else. Navy blue and a lighter shade. ‘Patrick colours’ she’d said when David called to request the design. Kudos to her for keeping their secrets. 

‘We’re going to be one of those couples’ Patrick said with a laugh. ‘Matching outfits.’ 

‘Ok, this next.’ David said, holding out another package to Patrick. He had secretly enjoyed a month or two of gift hunting for him. And while he hadn’t been able to be as extravagant as past David Rose had been, he’d really enjoyed the challenge. Patrick grinning at him opening the package only cemented that. 

Patrick grinned. Of course, David had bought him a sweater. In a deep blue that he noticed matched the scarf perfectly. And it was the softest sweater he had ever felt. ‘David it’s beautiful.’ he grinned. 

‘Of course, it is, I picked it.’ David bounced a bit on the bed. ‘Ok next.’ he said, indicating a square box. 

Patrick laughed, David had clearly taken this very seriously. He opened the box carefully. It was a selection of skincare products from the Store, with a note- in David’s hand- of instructions. Patrick smirked holding it up. ‘Is this a hint?’ he said. 

‘I will make you a skincare routine if it kills me.’ David said. ‘No boyfriend of mine will be seen with dry skin.’ He raised an eyebrow in comedic fashion to imply he was at least- in part- joking. ‘Ok next!’ he said triumphantly. 

‘David this is too much really.’ Patrick was honestly a bit taken aback that David had planned this many gifts. 

‘You got me a full Hannukah of gifts, and a Christmas one.’ David replied. ‘And a Stocking.’ he shrugged. 

‘Ok, ok.’ Patrick smiled. ‘But you’ve got two more too. Open that one first.’ he nodded at the larger of the two. 

David picked up the solid feeling package. It felt like a book. It was a book. He tilted his head and heard his boyfriend laugh. ‘A History of Baseball.’ he read aloud. ‘You’re so amusing.’ he raised an eyebrow. 

‘You never know, you might learn something.’ Patrick laughed. ‘And you make me watch Fashion Documentaries all the time.’

‘I don’t make you study it.’ he said, opening the book and flicking through ‘Ooh cute outfits.’ he said studying a bit closer, the collection of cute boys in cute outfits. ‘Hmm maybe this isn’t so bad….’ he continued to flick through.

‘There you go.’ Patrick grinned. David sheepishly put down the book after paying a bit too much attention to one cute boy in very tight baseball pants. 

‘Ok that one.’ he said, indicating the larger of the two.’ he grinned. 

Patrick picked it up. It felt and looked like a record. He opened it. It was. He laughed. Tina Turner’s The Best. He shook his head. ‘This is at once ridiculous.’ he leaned over and kissed David ‘And beautiful.’ he paused flicking his gaze down. ‘Just like you.’ he kissed him again, and sat back down looking fondly at the record. David grinned at him. Patrick grinned back dopily for a second. ‘Ok last one.’ he said nodding at the small gift left in front of David. 

David nodded and picked up the small square box. He unwrapped it to reveal a small mahogany box- again he recognised it from the Store or at least the design. He frowned and opened it. In Patrick’s familiar scrawl it said ‘So you have somewhere to keep your rings (and stop blaming me when you lose one) P x’

David looked up and smiled. He felt tears in his eyes. Patrick was acknowledging how much time he spent staying over here at Ray’s. And that he could leave something of him here all the time. He couldn’t speak. Instead, he leaned over and kissed his boyfriend deeply, hoping he got the message. Patrick looked at him fondly and nodded. 

‘Ok last one!’ David declared snapping back to life. 

Patrick nodded. It was a small flat package, about the same size as the record. He felt it, something hard and solid. He opened it and his face broke into a grin and it was his turn to try not to cry. 

‘Since you’re so fond of framing things.’ David said. ‘I know you can’t exactly hang it here, but maybe someday when you get your own place…’ he let that hang. 

‘It’s lovely David.’ Patrick smiled up at him and ran a hand over the frame. It was the poster for their first Open Mic Night. The poster- and the date- preserved in a frame, felt significant. Patrick for a moment let his mind run away with him and thought about- one day- putting this next to the frame of their first receipt. He looked up at David and smiled softly. 

‘Merry Christmas.’ he said looking up at his boyfriend, ‘I love you.’ 

‘Love you too.’ David said with a grin. He leaned over and kissed Patrick softly. And was shocked when he pulled back to see he was crying. And it didn’t quite look like happy tears. 

Patrick didn’t know where it came from for a second. One minute he was fantasising about some future life with David. The next he was missing home so much it hurt, and the next he was remembering all his parents didn’t know, and suddenly the two things were crashing together and he was crying. 

‘Sorry, sorry.’ he wiped frantically at his eyes. 

‘Is everything…’ David looked confused, and no wonder. 

‘Fine. Really.’ Patrick pulled himself together. Pulling at that thread would do neither of them any good really. ‘Really. It’s lovely. Sorry.’ he leaned over and kissed David again. Who nodded slowly looking unconvinced. 

David realised Christmas away from home was getting to Patrick a bit. But if he didn’t want to talk about it, then he wasn’t going to ruin Christmas by making him. David wrapped the scarf around Patrick’s neck and arranged it expertly. He patted it down and rested his hands on his shoulders. ‘How about a walk?’ he asked with a tilt of his head. 

‘I’m sorry David I thought I heard you suggest a walk.’ Patrick blinked at him with a smile, touched that David was clearly doing his best to move past his boyfriend’s over-emotional state, and grateful for it. 

‘I walk.’ He protested. ‘I walked here.’ he was on the verge of pouting until Patrick leaned over and kissed him. ‘Besides it’s Christmas, it’s snowing, it’s you know, romantic and stuff.’ he rolled his eyes. 

‘David Rose, are you asking me on a romantic snow-filled Christmas walk?’ Patrick tossed the scarf theatrically, earning him a glare. ‘Come on then.’ he said jumping up. 

It was incredibly quiet out. Everyone presumably at home preparing lunch or opening presents. They walked through town and paused in front of the Store, David snapping a picture of it covered in a dusting of snow. He looked over and glanced at Patrick with a grin. It did look magical and festive like that. Patrick was also, thinking about his Dad’s words, incredibly proud suddenly. He looped an arm around David’s waist and squeezed. David glanced down at him and frowned slightly. He caught Patrick’s grin and seemed to understand the sentiment. He looped his own arm around Patrick and squeezed back. They stood for a second looking at their Store, which hadn’t been their Store last Christmas day and enjoyed it. 

As they walked off, Patrick felt David loop an arm through his and looked up and smiled again. They walked the length of the town in silence, enjoying the air, and the quiet. On the turn back, they headed down to the path that parallelled the creek. It was snowier down here, away from the road, and a real hushed quiet. It was also unexpectedly beautiful. Patrick felt David drop his arm as the path got too narrow for them to walk easily arm in arm, and he reached back, feeling David take his hand instead, holding on until the path got wider. When it did, he felt David stop, pulling him to stop too. He turned half expecting him to be protesting at the mud, or cold or both. Instead, he just pulled Patrick back towards him and kissed him. As he did, the snow began falling again. 

David held Patrick still and kissed him. He could feel cold flakes of snow on his neck and cheeks, and on the hands, he now had on Patrick’s cheeks. He could be mad about it, normally he would be, about being cold and wet. But he was kissing his boyfriend, in the snow, on Christmas. And even he couldn’t be mad about that. Even he, for once, wasn’t second-guessing it. Patrick smiled up at him when he let him go, giving him another ‘what was that for?’ look. David shrugged, and Patrick reached up and kissed him again, before looping an arm around his waist and leading him on. They seemed to have settled into an unspoken agreement to walk in silence. And something about it, about their ability to do that, was magical too. 

Patrick could tell where David’s mind had been heading for a while. Towards the end of their walk, he’d become more and more tactile- more so even than his usual octopus-armed approach. His hand had more than once snaked under Patrick’s coat and sweater. Even once grazing the top of his jeans. He was clearly easily led as Patrick felt himself start moving his hand around David’s hips, squeezing a little as they walked. Until David finally stopped and kissed him in a manner that made him relieved nobody was around to see, because it was definitely one that usually stayed behind closed doors. That time David’s hand definitely made it beyond the waistband of his jeans. 

‘Hmm I’m starting to feel the cold David what about you?’ he said when they came up for air. 

‘Mmm.’ he agreed dipping his head to Patrick’s neck, ‘I think I should get out of these wet clothes.’ he grinned devilishly and steered Patrick quickly back towards Ray’s.


	4. Christmas Afternoon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Having worked up an appetite, Christmas Dinner and a Christmas nap.

Quite a while later they were lying wrapped in a pile of blankets on Patrick’s bed, having not ever made it under the covers, but being a bit too cold to just lay there afterwards. In fact a ‘quick lay down’ to recover had turned into a nap, which had turned into round two which had turned into bickering over who was getting up to get a drink. 

‘After all I just did for you. TO you.’ David said, ‘I deserve to lie here a little longer.’ 

‘Are you saying I wasn’t EQUALLY as involved there. Because I recall some heavy lifting on my part.’

‘Who are you calling heavy.’ David narrowed his eyes, and was silenced by Patrick kissing him. He groaned into his shoulder. And hauled himself upwards. 

‘Fine.’ Patrick said. ‘But only because I know I have to start on lunch anyway. Because you aren’t going to do it.’

‘I brought the food, I’m not cooking it.’ 

‘You brought it from the cafe.’

David shrugged. Patrick narrowed his eyes. ‘It’s a good thing I love you.’ David did that thing where his face broke into a spontaneous grin before he could entirely cover it up. Instead he grabbed Patrick’s waist and pulled him back towards him. He made an appreciative noise as David kissed him but then squirmed free. ‘Unless you don’t want to eat until dinnertime, you’re going to have to let me go.’ he said with a smile. 

David considered his options. While he was very much in favour of staying in bed all afternoon, he was also very much in favour of the Christmas lunch that he’d brought with him. He sighed, slightly dramatically and released Patrick. 

‘Make yourself decent.’ Patrick said as he pulled on his underwear and jeans and stood up. Pretending not to notice David’s appreciative gaze following his every move, and also giving his own glance up and down David who was lying now only partially covered by the blankets. ‘It might be just the two of us but I draw the line at naked Christmas dinner.’

‘Spoilsport’ David said, and was rewarded with his sweater landing squarely on his head as Patrick headed to the kitchen. 

To the Cafe’s credit, their Christmas dinner- even in reheated form, seemed to be at least edible, bordering on good. Or maybe it was a version of food Stockholm Syndrome having spent so long eating there. Or maybe just working up an appetite. Either way by the time Patrick was dishing it up his mouth was watering and his stomach growling. David had appeared after a shower, back in his fluffy jumper but with his hair still damp from the shower, and his checked pyjama bottoms. Patrick was now in a hoodie and sweatpants. It wasn’t exactly a Black Tie Christmas dinner, but there was something lovely about it. Patrick poured the wine and sat down. 

‘Shall we?’ he said, astonished David had waited even a second after his plate had touched the formica table surface. 

David held up his wine glass and Patrick mimicked the action. ‘Merry Christmas Patrick.’ he said with a smile and clinked his glass to Patrick’s. 

‘Merry Christmas David.’ Patrick said smiling. ‘Ok let's eat. I don’t trust reheating it a second time.’

‘Wise.’ David said making a face and diving in. 

Whether it was in fact hunger, or accilmitistion the food wasn’t bad. They ate quickly, and in relative silence, with comments about the food. David glanced over at Patrick as he ate, slightly concerned he was quiet today, but that it also seemed an unspoken thing today, quietly together passing the day. When they finished David looped an arm across Patrick’s shoulders and rubbed his hand up and down. His boyfriend looked over and kissed him. Then smiled. David smiled back. 

‘I’ll cook dinner next year.’ Patrick said with a soft smile. Hoping that was a safe thing to say. He was so certain of their future together. He was certain David was too. But that didn’t mean a remark like that wouldn’t throw him sometimes. David smiled back. 

‘Do I get to eat it in my pajamas still?’ 

Patrick grinned and nodded ‘I like that idea. It can be our first tradition.’ 

David grinned ‘You mean that’ he raised his eyebrows in the direction of the bedroom ‘Wasn’t?’

Patrick laughed. ‘I mean it depends if we have guests I suppose.’

‘Or if Ray’s home.’

‘Oh I really hope I’m not living at Ray’s this time next year.’ that did seem to catch David, ‘You know, probably time to start thinking about...my own place.’ Patrick said letting that hang. 

‘Hmm.’ David said. ‘Probably is.’ he paused and squeezed Patrick’s shoulders ‘Not that I don’t LOVE Ray’s early morning wake ups.’ 

‘Oh he gives me a lie in when you’re here.’ Patrick laughed. 

David was quiet for a moment. ‘Your parents could come, if you have your own place. Next year. Whatever. Whenever. You know.’ He shrugged and detangled his arm and refilled their glasses. Patrick reached up and ran a hand over his back as he did so. 

‘Yeah maybe.’ Patrick said quietly, his mind slipping away and distracting him with thoughts of everything that had to happen if he was going to ever have a family Christmas here. ‘Anyway, desert? I see you brought cake.’

‘Two kinds!’ David said triumphantly. ‘Save one for later.’ 

Patrick nodded. ‘Coffee?’ David nodded. He gestured towards the sofa in the living area of the kitchen-living room setup and Patrick nodded. David installed himself on the sofa curling his legs under him. Patrick cleared the plates but left them to wash later. He got out the first of the cakes- what looked like coffee cake- and put the coffee on. He heard the TV start to life, and snippets of different programmes as David searched for something to watch. 

‘Look!’ he exclaimed with barely contained glee, and Patrick glanced over. He’d managed to find ‘Love Actually’ on TV. 

‘David even you conceded it’s the low bar of Christmas films.’ 

‘Yes but we can sit and judge.’ His eyes were already fixed on the screen. 

Patrick shook his head and smiled. Coming between David and a romcom any time was an error, coming between him and a Christmas romcom seemed hugely unwise. Besides, if he was being given permission to judge…

‘Firstly the Prime Minister’s assistant isn’t fat.’ Patrick began from the kitchen, ‘Secondly, Emma Thompson should have dumped Alan Rickman on the spot and taken the kids- and I see what happens to him in Die Hard as revenge for that by the way- thirdly Keira Knightly was seventeen when this film was made, so all of her storyline is highly inappropriate. Fourthly, that guy from the Hobbit and the Welsh Girl are the only decent couple.’ 

David turned and looked at him open mouthed. 

‘Oh and Colin, God of Sex, was at least honest about what he wanted.’ Patrick turned and poured the coffee. Then carried it over to the sofa. ‘What?’

David blinked. ‘I love you.’ he said looking utterly puzzled but trying not to grin. Patrick laughed and leaned down and kissed him. He went back to the kitchen. Got the cake- one plate, two forks, and sat down. David was still staring at him bewildered. 

‘My Mom loves it.’ he explained. ‘I think I have seen it-’ he paused and glanced at the screen then said along with ‘Colin’ on screen ‘Stateside I am Prince William without the weird family’’ David looked weirdly impressed again ‘About 15 times?’ 

David grinned. ‘I am impressed.’ 

Patrick nodded proudly. ‘Thank you, I try.’

‘But you’re right this film is trash.’ he picked up the remote and flicked around a bit more, he found some kind of Christmas concert, and looked over at Patrick and shrugged, figuring they just wanted background noise anyway. Patrick nodded and picked up the cake, handing David a fork. They ate in contented silence for a while, Patrick occasionally battling David with his fork for a piece of the cake. Patrick watched him concentrating, but looking happy and content. He smiled. 

‘Did you really totally ignore the holidays these past couple of years?’ Patrick asked. 

David shrugged and concentrated on the cake. ‘I guess we didn’t really know what to do.’ he licked his fork. ‘Back home the holidays had always been, you know, a production and well I guess nobody wanted to have sad Christmas in a Motel.’ he shifted his eyes. 

‘What?’ Patrick asked. 

‘And well the first year, we couldn’t have afforded to do anything anyway.’ he shrugged. He didn’t talk about it often, what it had felt like having really, nothing at all. Not that they were ever going to starve or be homeless, thanks mostly to the kindness of the people around here. But his own spoiled brat moments aside it had been hard too watching his parents deal with that.

‘That’s tough.’ Patrick said, he took another bite of cake and thought for a moment. ‘You know a few Christmases, we stayed at my Aunt Karen’s for the whole thing- when she lived in Winnipeg- I thought it was to visit, but I found out later it was because my Dad was between jobs back and fore for a few years and well, we couldn’t afford to have a real Christmas. So Aunt Karen had us to stay so we wouldn’t have to worry about buying the fancy food. And she bought me presents when my parents couldn’t afford it...my Birthdays too those years.’ he shrugged, he wasn’t sure why he was telling David this now. 

‘I didn’t know.’ David said, licking some frosting off his finger. ‘How old were you?’

‘Like ten?’ Patrick said. ‘My Dad got his new job when I was 12 I think. Before that I guess my Mom’s part time salary didn’t go very far, she went back to teaching when I was 13 though so I guess after that they were ok...we never really talked about that time.’ he was very interested in the remaining frosting on the plate now. ‘I don’t know how bad it was but…’ he shrugged, he guessed he was trying to tell David he understood- maybe not quite on the same scale, but maybe they had a bit more shared experience than they thought. 

‘When we were little, and my other Grandma used to visit- Mom’s Mom, she used to remind us how they grew up with nothing. Full Dolly Parton Hillbilly stories.’ David traced a finger around the plate. ‘I think that’s why Mom took it hard when this all happened...she remembered all too well what nothing looked like, even if she hid it well shrieking about wigs.’ he concentrated very hard on the plate, and clearing the frosting. ‘I liked Christmas when we were little.’ he mused. 

Patrick took the plate to lick the rest of the frosting, but offered his finger with the last of it which David licked with a flourish. ‘What were they like?’ he asked. 

David leaned back. ‘Smaller. Calmer.’ he pulled his legs up under him ‘We didn’t move to the big house until I was, nine maybe? Rose Video didn’t really take off until like 1990, and my Mom spent nearly a year renovating that place…’ he rolled his eyes. ‘We had a you know, nice house in a nice neighbourhood, and we were a bit more...normal.’ he glanced over ‘If you can believe we were ever normal.’ Patrick smiled at him and rested a hand on his leg, which David covered with his hand. ‘And we’d have our Grandmothers over- I never knew either Grandfather- and Mom didn’t hate her sister quite as much then, and we’d have Hanukkah and Christmas as a family...I sort of forgot about that.’ 

‘Please tell me your Mom cooked.’ Patrick said with a grin. 

‘Let’s not get too crazy.’ he said ‘we invoked the Jewish clause on Christmas eve and ordered Chinese food, and the Grandmas fought over Christmas lunch.’ he smiled ‘Dad used to bake though.’ he raised an eyebrow ‘It was the one time of year he was home long enough to do anything and he baked. He was good too.’

‘I did not have Johnny Rose picked as a closet baker.’ Patrick mused. 

‘I used to help.’ David said with a small smile. 

‘Well.’ Patrick said leaning back on his end of the sofa, ‘That is very much a conversation for next Christmas and the baking I will require.’

David flicked his eyes down, and became very interested in some sugar on his pants suddenly. ‘Next Christmas?’ he asked, glancing nervously in Patrick’s direction. 

‘Oh I have big plans for next Christmas.’ Patrick grinned. He nestled himself into the cushions and held up an arm as invitation. David smiled and flopped over into Patrick’s side. ‘Oof. David I just ate all that cake you don’t want it coming back up in your hair.’ David grunted but nestled in deeper. Patrick leaned down and kissed his hair. ‘Good thing I love you.’ David stilled. And Patrick worried for a second something was wrong. David tilted his head up, grinning at him upside down. 

‘I love you too.’ he said. Grinning more as Patrick kissed the top of his head. 

Patrick smiled and reached for the TV remote as David settled in. He wrapped his arm around David and smiled when he took his hand too. He flicked through the channels until he found what seemed to be a black and white Christmas film of some kind. He shrugged and let it play, they could always find something else. 

‘Let me know if you get bored of it, we’ll find you some terrible romcom instead.’ he yawned, full of cake and food and if he was honest too much wine for 4 in the afternoon. ‘David?’ he looked down and David was already asleep. He smiled stroking his hair, he didn’t flicker at all, clearly fast asleep. He was endlessly fascinated that David had two modes- insomnia and instant sleep. Patrick smiled and watched the tv for a while, enjoying the warmth of David on him, and the quiet serene feeling of post-Christmas lunch. Until he felt his eyes growing heavy as well. 

Patrick stirred to a room almost dark, aside from the light of the TV. David was curled into his side still, fast asleep. The film was now some black and white film, filled with snow and some very chipper sounding English accents that Patrick couldn’t be sure were authentic. He yawned and looked down at David. He always looked younger when he was asleep. Maybe just because it was the only time his face was still. His hair, left unstyled from earlier was all over the place and curling. He moved a hand up and ran his fingers through it for a moment. David stirred a bit but didn’t wake up. Patrick let him lay there a while longer. The weight and warmth of him there was comforting, and they so rarely got uninterrupted quiet time together, he’d happily lie there all night if he could. Though David would probably object to that if it meant missing dinner. Still, he let his eyes rest on the screen for a while, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend again. 

David didn’t remember falling asleep. He wasn’t sure what woke him up. But the carol concert was back on TV playing softly when he did. He could feel Patrick’s chest rising steadily under his chest so he assumed he was asleep still. He enjoyed it for a moment. The quiet. The calm. He’d said to Patrick before, he’d slept with a lot of people, but he hadn’t let himself fall asleep with many. Doing that with Patrick remained one of his favourite things. In another first, he realised this was the first Christmas day nap he’d ever taken with someone. He buried his face a little deeper in Patrick’s sweater for a second, taking in the familiar scent of him, and feeling himself sigh inadvertently. He felt a hand come to his hair, and he made a soft moan in response, partly of pleasure, partly as it was the best greeting his half-awake state could muster. He felt Patrick chuckle under him, and smooth his hand through his hair again.

‘You awake?’ Patrick mumbled, playing with his hair again. It was now fully dark and the film had become carolers again. 

‘Mmm.’ David said into his chest. Patrick ran a hand over the back of his neck, and pulled himself up a bit, forcing David to move with him. He did, looking up bleary-eyed and blinking as he did so. Patrick smiled at him. He smiled back, then dramatically flopped his head down again. He turned his face on its side and worked an arm around Patrick. ‘You know I think we’re too old for what we did earlier, and for walks outside.’ he yawned ‘I’m exhausted.’ he huffed again. 

‘Mmm.’ Patrick said running a hand up and down his back ‘I guess you won’t want to do anything…’ he dropped his chin and lowered his voice ‘Physical. Later then.’ he kissed the bit of neck he could reach and David almost purred. Patrick laughed. 

‘Well let’s not make any rash decisions.’ David said, pulling himself up so he could kiss Patrick, who wound a hand around his back steadying him so he could stay there and deepen the kiss. Patrick didn’t object, and let himself be carried away by David’s very enthusiastic kissing for a while. Neither of them were pushing it any further. Enjoying the fact that for once there was no urgency. He felt David work his hands across his chest and around to his back, but again there was no sense of it leading anywhere immediately. Sometimes just being able to touch each other, as much as they wanted to, was enough. Patrick’s hand wandered lazily over David’s back and down his arms, gained him a satisfied moan from David, who nipped at his neck in return. He half laughed and half groaned. After a few minutes they naturally slowed. David placing a row of light kisses up his neck before giving him one last, soft but lingering kiss. He pulled back and looked at Patrick. 

‘You’re hungry aren’t you?’ Patrick asked with a grin.


	5. Christmas Evening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patrick has a dinner surprise planned. And calls home again.

‘You’re hungry aren’t you?’ Patrick asked with a grin. 

David rolled his eyes, but nodded. ‘I worked up an appetite today.’ he pouted. 

‘That and you need some energy for later.’ Patrick leaned up and kissed him again. ‘Ok get off me then. Dinner.’ 

David obeyed and leaned over flicking on the lamp as he did so. Patrick stretched and checked his phone. Seven. Definitely dinnertime then. He stood up and held out a hand to haul David up. He obeyed, ruffling his hair as he did so. Patrick made his way to the fridge and paused. 

‘So I hope this dinner is a success.’ he said hesitating. He’d planned on this even when David hadn’t mentioned coming over on Christmas. He’d assumed he would. And this had been part of his planned Christmas present, technically Hanukkah present. ‘And given the sun has gone down, this is also your final Hanukkah present. He opened the fridge and pulled out a box. Which he placed on the table. David frowned. Patrick gestured at it and he opened the lid. His face lit up. Inside were an array of Chinese food containers. 

‘Now I know it’s not from Chinatown, like the times you told me about...and granted it’s a day old now and-’

David stood up and kissed him. ‘Thank you.’ he said. He lifted his eyes to the ceiling trying not to cry, and felt Patrick’s hands come to his waist. 

‘Hey?’ Patrick said concerned. David sighed against him. 

‘I told you that in passing, months ago.’ he said, rolling his eyes at himself. He was crying over Egg Rolls, and to make it worse his boyfriend was reaching up and wiping away those tears. He couldn’t help it. He folded into Patrick for a second and held onto him. He’d mentioned months and months ago-probably barely two months into them dating- about his tradition of having Chinese food at Christmas. Joking it was a time honoured Jewish tradition, which wasn’t wrong. But it had also stayed his thing, even after they stopped having real family Christmases at home, with either Alexis, or one of his parents, or sometimes alone if nobody was around long enough. At some point over the holidays, he went and ate as much Chinese food as he could manage-preferably on Christmas itself, but at some point. He hadn’t said this, but it was the one thing about the Holidays he missed. He pulled back, wiping his eyes. 

‘Silly. Sorry.’ he said swallowing. ‘How did you even…’

Patrick grinned. ‘Ray actually. He had a meeting in Elm Glen yesterday early, I asked the restaurant if they could box this up for him...he drove it back last night.’ he shrugged, it had been nothing really. He’d thought it would be a nice Christmas meal for them, given their traditions had both taken a shift. Clearly it meant more to David than he’d realised. He used his sweater to wipe at his face again. ‘You ok?’ he asked. David nodded. And smiled. Patrick didn’t push, he knew what it was like to feel the emotions of the holidays bubbling up. If there was more to it, David would tell him. ‘Plates then.’ he said. He went to turn away to heat up the food, but David pulled him back and kissed him. ‘Plates.’ he said again when he was released. David grinned and let him take the food while he gathered plates and cutlery. 

‘Sofa?’ David asked as Patrick microwaved the last of the food. He nodded. David gathered plates and napkins and cutlery and took them to the coffee table. Patrick assembled the containers on a tray and brought them over. He watched David arrange himself in a nest of cushions legs folded under him but in perfect leaning distance from the food. Patrick poured him some more wine and topped up his own glass. He sat down and held up his glass in toast. 

‘Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah.’ he said. David grinned at him and clinked the glasses together.

‘To a delightful half and half situation’ David said with a grin. ‘Maybe I should teach you to cook some Jewish food for next year.’

‘So I’m responsible for Hanukkah and Christmas?’ Patrick said ‘I think you’ll find I technically have no authority over one of those.’ 

David glared at his words being thrown back at him. 

Patrick put his glass down. ‘Speaking of your Dad.’ he said. 

‘You aren’t about to ruin a mood here I hope.’ David made a face. 

Patrick screwed up his nose at whatever that might insinuate. ‘No.’ He said ‘But Ray did drop a second box of this off at the Motel yesterday. Stevie was delivering it for me.’ 

David’s eyes went wide, and then he looked down. ‘You’re too much you know that.’ he said glancing sideways. 

‘Well I couldn’t be sure you’d come over on Christmas. Couldn’t have you starving over at the Motel could we.’ he grinned, satisfied his plan had been a success. It was a good thing he’d put his glass down, because the force of David’s sideways hug would have meant terrible things for Ray’s upholstery. David clung on for a second before pulling back with a grin. ‘Go on.’ Patrick rolled his eyes seeing David practically drooling. 

David had to contain himself from actually moaning in pleasure. He thought that might actually cross a line of shame he wasn’t ready for. But the day-old, middling quality at best Chinese food tasted like heaven to him. Like Pizza, Chinese food was best either of the highest quality or junk-food tier. And this was the perfect blend of just on the verge of bad but good. The kind that would be perfect for a hangover, which the amount of wine they were drinking would probably come in handy tomorrow. 

‘I take it you approve.’ Patrick grinned over at him taking a bite out of an Egg Roll. Clearly David’s face had betrayed his pleasure even if he’d managed to keep quiet. 

David grinned. It was ridiculous how much this made him happy. He was trying to not think so hard about how kind and caring for his family Patrick was being, because that might make him dissolve into tears and not come back from that. So for now he settled for enjoying the food. 

A while later they’d drifted into easy conversation while continuing to pick at the food. Patrick was telling a story about his annoyingly perfect cousin John and their annual holiday cards, which in recent years had morphed into holiday videos as well. 

‘Full Hallmark Christmas.’ Patrick joked ‘Complete with an array of picture perfect children and a perfect dog.’ he rolled his eyes, ‘They’re nauseating really.’ he grinned ‘But, what John doesn’t know is his Mom tells the story of the year the dog chewed down the Christmas tree which is why the card was photoshopped that year. Small victories against Mr Perfect job and life.’ 

David hummed a response and poked at his food. Amused but suddenly concerned. He waited a moment then asked. ‘You um, don’t see Hallmark Christmas Kids in your future then?’ David raised an eyebrow in his direction. Patrick knew the question was weighted. He shrugged. 

‘Maybe I did once.’ he said honestly, ‘Just because you’re told that’s what you should see. I mean every holiday movie tells you that’s what you should see. You know, perfect around the tree singing carols and whatever.’ Patrick took a sip of his drink, ‘But I don’t need that no.’

‘I was born without whatever gene it is that makes you want them.’ David said. ‘So was my Mom for that matter.’ he picked at the noodles. 

‘Come on David your Mom might not be conventional.’ David laughed, ‘But she loves you both.’

‘You know in Bridget Jones, when Bridget’s Mom says ‘Honestly Bridget given the choice I don’t think I’d have children.’...my Mom has said that, many times.’ David glanced sideways ‘She loves us in her way.’ he conceded. 

‘You always knew it wasn’t...something you wanted?’ Patrick asked, again keeping his tone neutral, really it had never mattered to him either way. He liked kids, but he had never centred his life on having them. 

‘As sure as I was about never picking a team.’ David said with a wry smile, then his voice grew serious. ‘No matter on both counts how much people tried to convince me I’d change my mind.’ Patrick sensing he had more to say on it leaned in a bit and rubbed a hand over his shoulder. David nodded slowly. ‘When I was twenty two- twenty two I add- my girlfriend dumped me because she found out I didn’t want kids.’ he looked over at Patrick ‘I never have. And I have been dumped- more than once- and dumped by friends for it.’ he poked at the noodles on his plate ‘Most people think there’s something wrong with me….I mean something more.’ he stole a glance over. 

Patrick scooted over and took the plate off him. ‘Saving you from yourself there babe.’ he said with a smile. ‘David, listen to me.’ he put a hand on his shoulder ‘I don’t need that.’ David looked at him and seemed to consider if what he was saying was true. He gave his shoulder a squeeze ‘I have a bunch of cousins, who are either already popping out kids like crazy or can’t wait to start doing it. I can have the best of both worlds- kids you visit, spoil and give sugar to and then hand back to their parents.’ David laughed. Then looked serious again. 

‘But if you wanted it once…’ he shrugged. 

‘David I wanted to be a Major League baseball player once. Life changes, what you want changes. You know that.’ he leaned over and kissed David softly then scooted closer again. ‘David I don’t have a way to say this without it sounding incredibly cliche ok?’ David glanced over at him out of the corner of his eye then resumed looking down again, ‘But.’ Patrick continued ‘There’s more than one way to be a family.’

David finally looked over at him and nodded. Placated if not totally reassured. It had been a pattern for far too long, people wanting kids and not wanting him in their life because of it. He felt Patrick’s arm come around his shoulders and squeeze. 

‘Friends? Really David?’ he couldn’t quite believe people were so cruel and yet, the more he heard about David’s past life the more he was shown more of that side of people.

‘Christmas seven years ago-well New Years actually- I looked after my friend’s kids- one like toddler another baby, for her, I threw that kid a Birthday party and everything, while she had a broken leg. I don’t love kids, but I can handle them.’ he sighed ‘Six years ago she broke up with me. At Christmas. Fully friend dumped me because ‘having friends who aren’t married just isn’t working for us any more’ us, not her. She stopped being a her and was an ‘us’ and I was...nobody because I didn’t have what they had.’ he sighed. ‘I’d already bought my plane ticket to New York to visit her over the holidays. I spent it alone in a hotel room, until Alexis took pity on me and came to stay.’ 

Patrick didn’t know what to say, as he often did when the cruelty of David’s past friends came up. He’d been lucky his whole life with good friends, a family that was always there. He kissed David’s temple. ‘Her loss.’ he whispered, and felt David’s arms reach around him pulling him close. 

‘Mmm.’ David murmured ‘I have learned not to waste my time on people like that anymore.’ what he meant really was that he’d put the walls up so high that people like that couldn’t get in anymore. Patrick knew it too, but he didn’t push it now, instead he burrowed into David’s neck like a small animal, and David enjoyed the sensation for a moment, before leaning back on the sofa and pulling Patrick down with him. 

‘Oh hi there.’ Patrick smiled down at him, sensing the mood change. He leaned down and kissed David, letting his hand wander under his sweater. David’s hand similarly was chasing the waistband of his pajama bottoms. Things slightly heated up, until David gave a slight groan, and not of pleasure. Patrick sat up in his lap, a questioning look on his face. 

‘I love you but I cannot do that after that much Chinese food.’ David did look slightly green. Now Patrick thought about it sitting up a little too quickly, he likewise couldn’t contemplate anything remotely physical. 

‘Nope you’re right.’ Patrick said, pulling himself fully upright leaning on the back of the couch. ‘That would not end well.’ He agreed. And topped up the wine glasses. ‘And we’ve still got desert.’ 

‘Patrick.’ David said in a serious tone. ‘I know we’ve either been together too long, or I am now officially old.’ 

Patrick frowned at him. ‘Why?’

‘Because right now I want that cake more than I want to have sex.’ 

Patrick laughed. Then fixed David with a serious look. ‘David.’ he said ‘I know you well enough to not take that as an insult. With you cake will always be your first love.’

‘Cake has been there for me through a lot.’ David mused, then leaned over to kiss his boyfriend, just to reassure him he ranked pretty closely with cake. 

‘Tell you what.’ Patrick said, settling back into the sofa with his wine. ‘How about we finish this bottle while I let you give me commentary on Love Actually, then we have cake and then….’ he winked. 

‘Did you just wink?’

‘Yes, because I’m too full to do anything else.’ 

David attempted to lean over and kiss Patrick. But he was too far away. He groaned. Waved a hand dramatically in his direction and flopped back on his end of the sofa. Patrick laughed at him. He clicked on the TV and hit play on the DVD player. 

‘You were prepared!’ David said with glee. 

‘Call it anything for a quiet life.’ Patrick grinned, bracing himself for an onslaught of romcom trivia. 

It took two thirds of the movie for David to poke Patrick and demand cake. Patrick had decided getting up and obeying his boyfriend’s demands was the easier option. But in the time he’d been gone, David had also realised the wine was gone. So he wandered into the kitchen, feeling the full effect of the previous bottle suddenly. 

‘Um where does Ray keep his bottle opener love? Because I may have finished the bottle. Someone finished the bottle.’ David caught himself slightly rambling. Patrick didn’t look up when he came into the kitchen he was leaning on the counter looking at something. His phone David registered. He put the unopened bottle down on the counter. ‘I swear if you’re looking at spreadsheets on Christmas love….’ David caught a little hitch in Patrick’s breathing and hurried the last few steps. 

Patrick didn’t manage to hide it in time and he sagged onto the counter, before wiping at his face and holding his phone up. David took it off him. He was looking at a photo, presumably just sent to him. Of a crowd of people all dressed in an array of festive jumpers, around a tree in a small living room. David recognised Patrick’s Mom and Dad from other pictures he’d seen. His heart sank. He didn’t know what it was like to have an extended family to miss. But he ached for the look on his boyfriend’s face. So he did the only thing he could and wrapped himself around him from behind as tightly as he could. 

Patrick leaned down and kissed David’s arm, the only bit of him he could comfortably reach with him wrapped around him from behind. 

‘Sorry.’ he mumbled. 

‘Mmm’ David said into his neck, then detangled himself enough to speak, and Patrick turned around to face him, resting his hands on David’s hips as he looked up at him. ‘Don’t be.’ he said, and Patrick leaned into him wrapping his arms around him again. ‘It’s fine. Just you know, Christmas.’ he shrugged into David. 

David looked down, he felt a wave of guilt, ‘You should have gone home.’ he said softly. It was his fault Patrick had stayed. He should have pushed him to go, he would have coped just fine with another non-Christmas, but clearly the holidays meant a lot more to his boyfriend than he’d let on.

‘No it’s fine, it’s…’ Patrick shrugged. The word he was looking for was ‘complicated’ but Christmas Day wasn’t the time or place to have that conversation with David either. 

‘Call them.’ David said. 

‘I already spoke to them this morning.’ 

‘You think your Mom is going to complain that you call her more often?’ 

Patrick smiled softly. ‘Guess not.’ he said, he exhaled, maybe his cousins and his Aunts and Grandma were still there too and he could say hello. If not he could hear all about it. He nodded. ‘You keep watching the movie, I’ll go to the bedroom.’

David smiled, and rubbed his hands up and down Patrick’s arms. He felt guilty that he was part of the reason Parick had stayed. So this felt like the least he could do. He kissed his forehead before releasing him. ‘I will take care of the wine and cake.’ he said, before adding ‘Take your time.’ 

Patrick nodded. Touched by David’s caring attitude. He knew David didn’t understand what it was to have a conventional family, but he clearly wanted Patrick to be happy. He dialed his Mom’s cell number as he walked towards the bedroom. She picked up right away. 

‘Patrick honey are you ok?’ Marcy sounded concerned. 

‘I’m fine Mom.’ Patrick said getting to the bedroom, ‘I just thought I’d call and say hi to Grandma and Aunt Karen if they’re still there.’

‘Oh aren’t you sweet.’ Marcy said her voice warm and familiar and filling Patrick with an ache for home. ‘Let me give you Karen while I find Grandma.’ 

Before he could think about it Aunt Karen’s voice was filling his ear with enthusiastic and no doubt Sherry-fuelled tales of Christmas, and what his cousins had been up to. And one or two scandalous tales of gossip. His Aunt was a first-class gossip and a lover of a filthy tale or two. And occasionally a lack of boundaries. As demonstrated by her next question. 

‘And how is that handsome business partner of yours?’ she asked ‘And how does he feel about older women?’

‘Aunt Karen!’ Patrick exclaimed, he assumed that after they’d sent his parents some pictures from the opening and Open Mic night, Karen had also undergone some substantial internet stalking of David. 

‘What I read an old article about him that talked about his boyfriends and girlfriends so I know he’s open-minded.’ Karen chuckled. 

‘That’s one word for it.’ Patrick said. ‘Not sure he’s looking right now though.’ he added. 

‘Well a girl can dream.’ Karen said, then in a serious tone, ‘you know we all accept that about him- who he dates all that. You don’t have to worry about anyone in the family that way.’ 

Patrick wondered if there was anything weighted in her comments or if she was just being nice. ‘Thanks Aunt Karen.’ he said ‘He’s had it rough sometimes so I’m sure he’d appreciate that.’ 

‘Well honey it can’t be easy.’ Karen said ‘If you don’t quite fit what everyone assumes.’ she paused ‘Or even what everyone always thought you were, you might worry people won’t accept you. But you know everyone here would, right honey?’

Patrick froze. Was she really saying what he thought she was? ‘Um, sure. I’m sure D-David will appreciate that.’ he stuttered. 

‘Patrick honey, if you ever you know want to talk to someone who isn’t your Mom.’ she let it hang there. 

‘Aunt Karen, actually-’ he was cut off by his Mom’s voice in the background. 

‘Oh your Grandma’s here.’ Karen said then dropped her voice. ‘But call me sometime honey ok?’

‘Ok.’ Patrick said softly, then on hearing his Grandma’s tentative hello, switched gears to catching up with her. His heart still pounding. 

Fifteen minutes later he’d been passed around half the gathering at his parent’s house and was back to his Mom. 

‘Oh thank you for calling again sweetie.’ she said, taking the phone back from his Dad again. ‘I know your Grandma loved talking to you. And you know Karen loves to gossip with you. She’s slightly obsessed with David and his family, we should watch her. She'll be starting a scandalous affair with your business partner before we know it, you know what she’s like.’

Patrick attempted a laugh but it got caught.

‘What’s wrong honey?’ His Mom asked. ‘Are you lonely? I know it must be hard spending your first Christmas alone, I’m just sorry you couldn’t make it home.’

‘Actually I’m not alone.’ Patrick said in a sudden emboldened surge of either bravery or stupidity ‘David came over, we just had dinner.’ 

‘Oh that’s lovely.’ Marcy said ‘I’m glad you aren’t alone, you're so lucky he’s such a good friend.’

Something caught in Patrick’s chest and he felt tears prick in his eyes. Yet again he hated himself for lying to his Mom. And more so, for keeping this from David. Who had done everything he could to make Patrick’s Christmas better. He sniffed. 

‘Yeah, really lucky Mom he’s, a…’ he sniffed again ‘he’s a really good person.’ 

‘He seems like he is. I can’t wait to meet him one day.’ 

That really set Patrick off. He felt hot tears streaming down his face. At once longing for that day but completely terrified of what that meant. 

‘Actually Mom.’ he said his voice catching tears still falling, ‘I was meaning to tell you something, I um-’

There was a crash at the other end of the line, and some swearing he recognized as his Dad’s voice. ‘Clint! For goodness sake!’ his Mom scolded ‘He dropped the punch bowl.’ she explained. ‘Sorry honey you were saying?’

Patrick shook his head. Not the time. ‘Oh um, just I’ve been thinking of moving, you know getting my own place so you and Dad can come visit in the New Year.’

‘Oh that’s good.’ she said ‘Probably time you got more space. You know you can have company over then as well.’

‘Sure Mom.’ he said sadly, aware of David waiting for him in Ray’s living room again. ‘I should let you get back to Dad everyone.’

‘Thanks for calling again.’ she said, there was a pause ‘Are you sure there’s nothing else sweetie? You can tell me anything you know.’ 

Patrick paused. He could he knew. Except the one thing he wanted to and was too scared to say out loud. ‘I’m fine Mom.’ he said ‘really I am.’ he paused. ‘I just miss you all.’

David stood in the hallway, letting Patrick finish his call. He ached for his boyfriend. Who clearly missed home more than just today. He knew he was happy here. But he also knew like David he hadn’t come here by choice exactly. What that meant in the future occasionally scared him. But also it was a thing he couldn’t fix either. And he had to remember it wasn’t about him. 

‘Love you Mom’ he heard his boyfriend say. Then a moment before he heard a muffled sob. He steeled himself and forced himself to stay put for a moment. Give Patrick the privacy he knew he’d crave for just a few seconds. 

Patrick let himself cry for a second. Let himself feel both horrible for what he’d done. But also just to be sad about missing home. He sniffed and wiped his eyes with his sleeve and looked up. David had appeared at the doorway, he was holding the wine, two glasses and the cake. He leaned on the doorframe.

‘You know it’s not really Christmas unless someone has disappeared to have a good cry. It’s usually me.’ he walked across the room, placing the wine and cake on the floor before lowering himself down too and next to Patrick, reaching an arm around him. Patrick rested his head on David’s shoulder for a second and let out a long breath. 

‘Sorry David.’ He sighed. 

‘What for?’ David didn’t move, except to run a hand up and down Patrick’s arm. 

‘I don’t want you to think I’m ...sad to be here with you.’ he shifted to look at David who nodded at him slowly. ‘Or that I regret staying or...anything.’ he swallowed hard. He knew he was projecting a lot of stuff David didn’t know and he felt a familiar panic rise wondering if he’d guess. David just gave him a smile and shook his head. 

‘I just figured you missed your family. You know like normal people do.’ he felt Patrick laugh which turned into a little hitching sob for a second, until he got control again. He wiped his eyes. 

‘I didn’t think it would bother me this much.’

David waited a second, then said carefully. ‘You’ve never spent Christmas away from them have you?’

Patrick paused and shook his head. ‘I’ve never spent this long away from them.’ he hadn’t admitted that to David before and he was slightly embarrassed. 

David smiled. ‘Shall I tell you a secret?’ Patrick nodded. ‘I don’t think they realise, but I’ve never gone a month without seeing one of my family...even when we weren’t as much a family.’ he rolled his eyes. ‘It doesn’t exactly fit my cool image, but I was always much more a homebird than Alexis. I mean given that history, obviously. I just never...strayed that far from home.’

‘I thought you lived in New York?’ Patrick said. 

David nodded. ‘I did.’ he looped his arm through Patrick’s ‘But it wasn’t exactly far to come home if I needed to- and when you have access to a private jet.’ he added with a nudge ‘But my Mom and Dad worked there a lot, that’s why I picked it. And it was a handy base for Alexis to breeze through. All in all I never went that long alone. It may surprise you to learn, as much as other people are...tiresome, I don’t function well alone.’ he exhaled ‘But I found myself alone at the Holidays a lot more than I liked.’ 

‘I’m not alone.’ Patrick said, turning his head to him. 

David smiled, and shook his head. ‘No, you’re not.’

‘And neither are you.’ Patrick said. He wanted to say something more. Something about never being alone again, but he didn’t know how David would take it. It was too much he told himself. And it’s Christmas and you’re being over-emotional, and needy and-

‘I wish Christmas was always like this.’ David interrupted his thought spiral and then looked as shocked as Patrick felt at the revelation. ‘Well, um not always like this. I mean I can live without Ray’s choice of decor, and I’d like to spend Christmas Eve not in a single bed in a Motel but-’

Patrick cut him off with a kiss. ‘I want Christmas to always be like this.’ he hoped the wine and the season would let him get away with such declarations. David smiled shyly back letting him know he’d gotten away with it. ‘But first.’ Patrick added ‘I need to finish that cake.’ David’s smile shifted into a grin. 

Much later they were curled up in bed, full of wine and cake. A lazy kiss had turned into lazy, slow sex and they were both quickly slipping off to sleep in the warmth of the bed. Patrick felt David shift into him a bit more, his hand slipping under his T-shirt and his head tucked into his shoulder. Patrick made a contented noise and dropped his head to kiss David’s hair. 

‘Hey David.’ Patrick murmured. David responded with a soft hum. ‘I don’t want to sound like I’ve watched too many romcoms but…’ he brought a hand up to David’s soft hair ‘You’re the best Christmas present I could ask for.’ 

David didn’t move, but Patrick saw his grin. ‘You really have watched too many romcoms.’ David muttered. 

‘And whose fault is that?’ Patrick said sleepily, wrapping his arms around David under the covers. ‘I love you.’ he whispered, his eyes growing heavy. 

‘Love you too.’ David said into his chest as his eyes closed.


	6. Boxing Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next morning, Patrick thinks about next Christmas.

David woke up to wintery sunshine through the curtains, it was chilly in the room and for a second he burrowed down under the covers. When his brain woke up enough he checked on Patrick. He was curled up on his side facing David, still fast asleep. He smiled, and enjoyed what he admitted always felt a slightly creepy way, watching Patrick sleep for a minute. Given he was usually the last to wake up it wasn’t something he experienced often. Patrick would hate him for thinking it but he looked very small, and by association, very adorable in David’s eye’s when he slept. Also he was an incredibly peaceful quiet sleeper. He barely moved from wherever he fell asleep- unlike David who could, much to Patrick’s chagrin, wake up the opposite side of the bed to the one he fell asleep in. He also much to both Alexis and Patrick’s amusement, talked in his sleep. Patrick however was perfectly calm and perfectly still. David took a moment to enjoy his boyfriend’s handsome face while he wasn’t awake to notice or tell him off and blush at his staring. It had been long enough to get used to, but nowhere near long enough to stop thinking how lucky he was. David grinned to himself. 

‘Best Christmas present ever’ he muttered and hauled himself out of bed. He had a plan. 

Patrick woke up slowly. He could tell it was late and he’d slept in by the wintery sunshine in the room. It was cold too, which meant he hadn’t been up early enough to convince Ray’s temperamental thermostat to kick back in. He burrowed under the covers again and reached for David, partly for warmth. He flicked his eyes properly open again. David wasn’t in bed. Surely it couldn’t be that late he reasoned. Probably in the bathroom, his half-asleep brain told him. He leaned over for his phone. It was 9am. A real lie in then. He registered noise from down the hall and a faint smell of coffee. Perhaps David had managed that at least. He hauled himself out of bed. 

The coffee was indeed brewing. And David stood at the Stove. Making pancakes. Patrick stood in the doorway for a second, taking that in. David was in his black and white pyjamas, he had on the socks Patrick had given him for Hanukkah, with Patrick’s grey hoodie over the top, sleeves rolled up. His hair, not being styled yesterday was curly and wild in a manner Patrick had never seen. Never been allowed to see. And right now he was concentrating very hard on the optimal moment to flip a pancake. Patrick waited and waited with him until he succeeded. 

‘Well that looks like it was perfect.’ Patrick said. 

David started a bit, not having heard or sensed him there his concentration was so great. He grinned and took in his boyfriend for a second. He had obviously stumbled out of bed realising he wasn’t there. He had on his old grey robe- mental note to buy him a new one next Christmas- which was undone so his fitted t-shirt was still visible. Thick black socks, and his hair, even though it was short managed to look rumpled. David grinned again. Still gorgeous. As he thought it something flickered over Patrick’s face. David flicked the pancake he was working on to a plate while glancing over concerned. Patrick walked towards him. He wrapped his arms around him from behind and burrowed his head into his back. 

‘You made pancakes David.’

David brought his hand up over Patrick’s on his stomach. He let him have a moment there for a second. Then he turned around, so Patrick had to rest his hands on his hips. He nodded. ‘You see Pancakes on Boxing Day are ideal- perfect hangover breakfast, and brunch if you don’t get up early like some people.’ he leaned down and kissed Patrick ‘You can put fruit in them to balance out yesterday’s indulgence...or chocolate chips to continue it.’

‘And you put chocolate didn’t you?’

‘That is correct.’ 

Patrick grinned up at him. But with something else, David felt his hands working into his top. ‘Thank you David.’ he said.

David leaned down and kissed him again. ‘I just made pancakes.’ he said ‘Pour the coffee.’ he waved the spatula for emphasis, as he turned back to the pan and poured some more batter in. He allowed himself a grin of satisfaction as he did so. 

As they finished their pancakes Patrick reached over for David’s hand. They sat quietly for a while. Finally Patrick spoke. 

‘Pancakes on Boxing Day might not be my usual Christmas tradition, but I think I like it.’ he said. 

David grinned. ‘Me too.’ he said with a squeeze to Patrick’s hand. ‘Now didn’t someone promise a shopping trip to Elmdale? It’s not exactly Oxford Street Boxing Day Sales, but I’ll take what I can get.’

Patrick rolled his eyes. A day being dragged through the boutiques of Elmdale wasn’t his idea of fun. But he also knew lunch would feature heavily. ‘Ok ok I’ll shower…’ he pulled himself up. 

He picked his phone up from the bedside table. A text from his Mom. 

‘Hope you had a nice evening with David. Thanks again for the gifts. We all missed you today! Merry Christmas xx’

He smiled, just as David came in. He was happy he realised. Happier than he’d ever been. He needed to make everything right. A New Year’s resolution maybe. Maybe he’d call Karen after all. Already thinking about next Christmas that was what he wanted. Not the Hallmark card Christmas. Just his version of a family one. 

‘What are you thinking about?’ David asked with a slight frown. 

‘Next Christmas.’ Patrick said honestly, leaning up to kiss him as he went past. Next Christmas things would truly be right.

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to explore Patrick thinking about coming out a while before he did, and how that would loom larger in the holidays. 
> 
> Also the imagined Aunt Karen is very much the same Aunt Karen who features in my other fic 'In Case You Don't Live Forever' where her love for David is also well documented.


End file.
